Stop scrolling through your social feed and reading about what people are watching on TV, chuckling at clever memes, and laughing (out loud) at cats being hilarious. It’s draining your productivity.
Just imagine what you could be accomplishing if you were doing something else.
1. Work harder at work. You’ll gain a massive edge on your coworkers with the added effort of working at work.
2. Talk to a friend with your voice. One of the great things about talking is that you’ll receive an immediate response.
3. Read one of those books you have.
4. Write that book you always talk about writing. That’s the best way to get it done.
5. Learn to play an instrument. It won’t happen while you’re watching people pour ice over their heads.
6. Exercise. You’ll live longer and have more time to Instagram in your golden years.
7. Buy an actual birthday card because you remember someone’s birthday.
8. Make eye contact. With anyone.
9. Look up. There’s interesting stuff in front of you.
10. Learn to code. Then you can build the next great social network and make a billion or two.
11. Go see a movie. You still get to stare at a screen and don’t have to talk to anyone.
12. Walk your dog. He’s been holding it for too long.
13. Plan a vacation. Think of all the photos you’ll be able to post.
14. Invent something. Inventions have historically made the world better.
15. Volunteer for something. You’ll get a like from whomever you help.
16. Plant a seed. The few minutes this takes will result in the growth of something beautiful, and depending on which seed you plant, may bear fruit that you can eat (think FarmVille, but for real).
17. Leave the bathroom. Quit reading tweets and finish up already.
The list is over. You should be doing something else by now.
Marc Hartzman is author of our Anti-Social Network Journal ($14) and contributing Knock Knock blog writer. Check out his hilarious posts here and enjoy his musings on how social networking has affected life as we know it—for better or worse!