Like a brace-faced adolescent being asked to junior prom, we felt a heightened sense of elation when this postcard came in the mail a few months ago. Our head honcho Jen said herself that it’s one of her favorite customer correspondences ever. She really did use “ever”—and for good reason: (Go on, read it.)
I really wanted to use this post to give a personal thank you right back to this friend of Knock Knock, since it made us feel all warm and bubbly inside. All the jadedness in the world couldn’t dent the gratitude we have for our customers, even if he or she makes grammatical person, punctuation, and spelling errors in their messages (who would we be if we didn’t notice that as well?).
Unfortunately, he or she left out a name. Anyways, here’s my attempt at a thank you in return for his or her thank you:
Dear Bronx, (We decided to call you “Bronx”, since Bronx, New York is the closest characteristic of your persona that we can grasp—other than the fact that you might be a borderline-nihilist, which is possibly a good thing in our book.)
Thank you for your lovely, handwritten postcard. We are so grateful to have fans like you who help us pay “for rent and all the other protections needed against those ghastly natives.” What can we say? Sometimes even the Venice-born, dog-loving, bike-riding, orgaddict (that’s a combined word for “organic addict,” which our marketing and digital coordinator just made up) surfer can be intimidating.
And we also know how it feels to be misunderstood. Do you know how many people mistake our banter for snarkiness? We wouldn’t be able to keep track, even if we put our twenty-five pairs of hands together to keep count. (That’s 250 < people who mistake Knock Knock as being pure snark—in layman’s terms.) But still, we are what we are, and you are what you are. We’re just happy to fold laughter into what you call “The Joke” itself.
Also, thanks for your suggestion. Perhaps we could use that quick one-liner if we ever update our Insults & Comebacks for All Occasions book . . . Or if we’re ever confronted by frienemies in a battle of verbiage (a follow-up snap would be necessary in this case). Furthermore, we wonder what your colleague-relationship is with this said “cop.” Are you also a cop? Or are you maybe a gumshoe? Because having a Knock Knock fan working undercover would be oh-so-rad.
Thanks again and hopefully you will allow us to call you our “peep” from Bronx in return.
The Knock Knock Team
Case in point: Friends, you are wonderful. Keep the snail mail coming and you could see it on our blog!